Bottoms Up!

Okay, it's my favorite current event; I can't help it:

Last week, negligent comicide charges against Tammy Jean Warner were dropped -- Tammy Jean being the woman who gave her husband the fatal sherry enema in 2004. She wasn't trying to kill him, he asked her to help him out. The problem was, his BAC shot up to .47, and he died.

See, he was an alcoholic with some sort of throat condition, so he did what any good alcoholic would do: he got creative. And she did what any good enabler would do: she squeezed two bottles of sherry through a hose and up into her hubby's rectum. Actually, I think that's considered above-and-beyond, even by hardcore codependent standards.

Good thing it wasn't a Mai Tai; those little umbrellas are pointy! Ouch!

But here's my question: If red wine goes with red meat, and white wine goes with fish and poultry, what in the heck goes with rectal sherry?

So again I ask: WHY ARE PEOPLE SO WEIRD???

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